Let the games begin.

When he finally got around to adding me, Pogues came up with a comment that went a little something like this:



Well, having been pretty busy with my own projects and attempting to juggle a social life in there somewhere, last night I was finally able to come up with my own response:



Just thought everyone would get a chuckle out of this, since I'm such an @$$hole!

Hey gang:

Not sure how many of you subscribe to my blog (and if you're not, you should be), but I'm going out of town Thursday night and will be returning Friday evening. I should be back before Movie Night starts, assuming NorthWest Airlines doesn't cancel my return flight, and there are no delays. It should be non-stop from North Carolina to Detroit, and my mother will be picking me up.

Movie Night #55 will be a regular movie night (after last week's wild and crazy Non-Movie Night #4, I need a little bit of a break), BYOB and RSVP if you're bringing friends.

Again, I will hopefully be there on time for this, but I will try to call if I am running behind significantly.

Come on over and let's have another awesome time watching movies! Hope to see you there!

If you know me, you know that I love comics, and I try to enjoy movies.  As a Scorpio, I have a tendency to feel and act very passionate and emotionally about things.  That said, when someone makes a terrible movie that destroys my faith in comic movie adaptations, I get a little annoyed about it.

Enter director Tim Story.  This guy has made a career on music videoes and commercials, and had his first real big break with a little-known comedy called Barbershop.  Somehow, that movie segues into a Fantastic Four contract deal, and he's magically become the authority on Marvel's first family.  Here's the major problem: the movie's not based on the original Fantastic Four, but on the Ultimate Fantastic Four - a retelling of the Marvel characters from scratch, new origins and everything.  A modernization, if you will.

Now, I have no problems with the comic series - if I don't like it, I can just not pick it up.  I've chosen to ignore most of the Ultimate titles (I gave Ultimate X-Men a shot, and didn't like the pacing or screwy origins - it confused me more than interested me; I also gave Ultimate Spider-Man a quick read, and the first graphic novel didn't hold my interest; I do collect the Ultimates, however, which are the Ultimate Avengers).  However, when a studio invests as much money as they do into their advertising, branding, and marketing as they do with a movie that they hope will do better than it's original (and let's be honest, Hollywood loves a crappy sequel), it's a little more difficult to ignore than a book on a shelf.

Enter the nameless producer guy that I think handles all comic-related properties in Hollywood.  I know that Hollywood uses forumlas and focus groups to maximize profits (by appealing to the widest audience possible) and get butts in seats, and I thought it would be funny to try to show that formula here.  Despite the fact that the first FF movie did poorly in theaters (ultimately made money, hence the sequel, but was a deplorable piece of filmmaking nontheless), someone decided to green-light a sequel.  I had been losely following the rumors online, and once I heard the Silver Surfer was in it, I started to question if this movie might have some promise.

I started to wonder if Tim Story had learned something making the first movie.

But alas, that was not the case.  Websites left and right were announcing that Galactus (the devourer of worlds, and the evil boss of Silver Surfer) would be not a guy in a giant purple outfit, but would instead be a giant electrical storm cloud.  This had to be the most retarded idea I had heard since Dr. Doom being affected by the same cosmic rays as the Fantastic Four, and having metal under his skin.  But when I heard that Galactus production design was Tim Story's idea, I cursed myself for ever second-guessing my original thoughts on his abilities as a filmmaker.

Let me be known that, no, I have not seen the FF sequel...and I don't plan to.  I put off the first one for a good long time, but sadly it was not long enough.  What a horrible movie, lacking any drama or emotional connection to the characters what-so-ever.  The only even remotely interesting character in the first flick was The Thing, and he didn't have enough screen time.  And then the studio made the mistake of hiring Jessica Alba - pretty face, no acting talent.  I knew from the first time I saw her on Dark Angel that she couldn't act.  She only had three facial expressions:

1) puppy dog - which doubled for angry and sad,
2) happy - where painted a giant grin on her face, which attracted all of the adolecent male viewers to try to look up pictures of her on the internet,
3) and blank - her everyday face.

Wow, nice range you have there.  As a fledgling actress, this can be expected...but once you have some flicks under your belt, I would expect a little more.  Not only that, but this movie comes on the cusp of the announcement that she will be in the American remake of a Japanese horror classic, The Eye.  Why I think she'll fail: she has to play a blind woman who can see for the first time.  Not only that, but she's seeing ghosts.

However, my disgust at Hollywood's inability to make an original movie anymore is a rant for another time.

So, going back to Hollywood and formulas, I figure that the success of this movie is two fold:

1) Jessica Alba has become a name in movies, despite my opinions about her (lack of) actinig abilities, and the teenage male wants to see her running around in tights and kicking ass
2) the average movie-goer is pretty stupid and easy to entertain

Hence, today's comic:


Did I know that this was going to be the #1 movie in America when I wrote it 2 weeks ago?  No, I didn't.  However, looking at the other options of what was coming out, and using that amazing 6th sense that I have which is able to predict the future fairly accurately, I made an educated guess and went with this latest installment of my rant about society, @$$hole.

###

On a good note, Day Watch just arrived at the Michigan Theater here in Ann Arbor, and I have every intention of re-watching Night Watch and going to see it this week!  I'll probably go on Thursday, since I have Friday off.  9pm showing.  Anyone care to join me?

Also, I'm almost done with the first round of @$$hole strips.  I had originally announced that I would do the first 20 or so strips, and then have another round of guest strips.  Well, the invites went out last week for them, and I have had 5 people get back to me with a positive response (Jeremy, Shane, Laura, Erin, and Kevin).  This round of guest strips are going to be from people who do not have a web comic series, but enjoy doing artwork anyway.  Should be fun to see what they put out.

Well, I'm out for now.  Later!

T

Carl, Scott, and I finally got together last weekend and started the Exile 3 pages. We’re going to get the first 6 done, and then pass it off to others who would like to keep it going. Scripts are available, as we want to end this story and then we can begin working on a new one - an Exile 4, if you will.

I was able to finish the illustration and inking over the weekend, and most of the coloring is finished, however I’ve run into a slight production snag in some of the effects that I’m trying to create. It’ll only set me back a few days, and the page will be off to Carl so he can start working on the next page.

Hint: the snag is a social life. It’s a good thing to have, but it does sometimes get in the way of things.

I also have 2 more poster designs ready to be worked on. I plan to get those done next week, assuming no more social interruptions / special events. The headlines are as follows:

“An Alliance is Forged”
“A King Will Fall”

I’ll let the images play around in your heads until I finally post them on here, but they will rival Scott’s very awesome poster of Moby’s face. (Or at least, I can hope)

In any case, expect some updates very soon, with some new content! Yes, new Exile 3 content. Also, feel free to sign up and join us on the forums, let us know a little about you - introduce yourself. And if you’d like to join us and contribute to the Exile, tell us that to.

T

t Night was my 1st year anniversary with Laura, and we of course had to attend the Necto (the place where we first met), but more on that later. 

Sunday we exchanged gifts.  I got her the first two seasons of Buffy on DVD, knowing that she was a huge fan of the show (and already owned the third season).  She got me some stuff related to a play that we will be going to see next month, Wicked.  Ever since I first saw the play last year with Amy, I have wanted to read the book and know more about the production.  Laura bought me a signed copy of the book (which I instantly began reading), as well as a "making of" book for the play.  It covers the history of the performance, actor bios, production stills, and tons of factual information about the set-making processes and costumes. 

Laura also made me a frame (although you can hardly call it that, since it's pure art) for a future picture of the two of us...which I will have to take soon, so I can bring the frame to work and decorate my workstation with her beautiful face!

So, Monday was the actual anniversary date, and we met up at my apartment after work.  After some attempted napping (that girl always seems to have energy when I don't), we got ready for the club and left for dinner.  We went to her favorite place in downtown Ann Arbor, Totoro, for sushi.  After that, we went to the club where we first met.

Interestingly enough, Factory Night at Necto was celebrating its 3rd year anniversary as well, so the place was pretty packed from the start.  Most of the friends showed (Mary was there with Bradd, Shane and Kelly, Ben, Alex, Gary, Raelynn, and many others - including special appearances by Megan and Carleena), and a good time was had by all.  I tried to make it to midnight, to celebrate Megan's birthday with her and the group, but I just couldn't keep my eyes open any longer. 

I was completely exhausted by the long weekend of Father's Day BBQ after BBQ, and stressed about not being able to get anything productive done this week (Friday was Movie Night, Saturday was BBQ, Sunday was Brunch and 2 BBQs, Monday was the anniversary, Tuesday is dinner with her family, Wednesday is working out and Bubble Tea with Megan, Thursday is dinner with my brother, and Friday is Movie Night again).  However, I had a blast and enjoyed seeing everyone again. 

Thanks to everyone for wishing Laura and I a happy anniversary.  We truely appreciate it. 

Next week:  I plan to hermit myself and get some stuff done that I want to do.  Until then, keep an eye out for me!

My buddy Andy has been hanging out with Arizon for I-don't-know-how-long, but has apparently been reading the blogs and reviews for Movie Night.  Well, he's back in the area, and was so excited about attending that he called me at 7:30pm to come over so he could be the first person to attend (the first person in the door gets to pick the three titles that the group votes on).  I was working out at the time, so he couldn't show up until everyone else...around 9pm or so. 

His choices were "Sympathy for Mr. Vengence," "The Princess Blade," and "Bubba Ho-Tep."  These movies have come up before as options, but I guess everyone was in a "B-Movie" mood, as we watched a Bruce Campbel classic!


     Movie Night #53:  Bubba Ho-Tep (2002)
     Director:  Don Coscarelli
     Cast:  Bruce Campell, Ossie Davis, Ella Joyce, Heidi Marnhout
     Plot:  Elivs (Campbell) is alive and well and living in a nursing home, but no one believes that he's the real deal.  Having switched with an Elvis-impersonator some years back in an attempt to dodge much of the negative points of being famous, Elvis lost his contract with the man who took his place in a small BBQ accident.  Now, he's living a life with a potentially-cancerous puss on his manhood, and no desire to go on living. 

He befriends JFK (Davis), a man who claims that the government took his brain and replaced it with a bag of sand, and then dyed him black.  The two of them discover evidence that a mummy from ancient Egypt is sucking the souls of the residents to extend his own life, and they vow that he must be stopped. 



I saw this movie in theaters with Bruce Campbell, before it was actually released publically (a "pre-screening," if you will...but I paid for it).  This was back when I went to get my copy of his book signed with Scott and Carl, "If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B-Movie Actor" (a book that I still have yet to get back from my cousin Justin).  It was brilliant then, and it's brilliant now.  The performance of the cast was truely something to behold - a landmark for Bruce Campbell, and an impressive feat for Ossie Davis, who usually stars in more classic and renown works.  Many people questioned why Davis was even in this movie, thinking him a little "above" it.  Personally, I think he did it because the roll was just so much fun.  Unfortunately, this was the last performance of actor Ossie Davis. 

The movie is campy and fun, and sports the low-budget look and feel that you come to expect from a Bruce Campbell movie.  You can't take anything that you see in this movie seriously - and if you do, you'll enjoy it less.  The attack of the scarabs is particularly hilarious to watch, as they appear to be giant motorized rubber bugs - which is probably what they are. 

The movie does have some good messages about the elderly community and rest homes.  Having just finished up my own personal experience with them some years ago, when my Grandma died, I have come to realize that they are not always an enjoyable place to live, much less visit.  Themes about loneliness and a sense of worth are important themes to this movie, as they provide a person with the desire and drive to keep living.  Laura laughs at me whenever I try to derive deeper meaning from a flick that's this silly, but I guess that "Film Interpretation" class I took in college won't let me not look for a deeper meaning in the movies I watch. 

Take from it what you will, this flick is a bundle of laughs and good time with some friends. 

Next week:  Non-Movie Night #4!

If this page looks a little below my usual work in quality, that's because it is.  I threw this page together in about 2 hours, having had the idea for it about a week before Fantastic Four 2 came out to theaters, but not having the time to put together a good comic for it.  I had to replace the comic that was slated to go up on that day, and push it back a few weeks to make room for a rebuttle to how Fantastic Four does in theaters, and a commentary about our current oil prices.

Also, I did the coloring and text on my laptop, which apparently doesn't have all of the same fonts loaded as my desktop (which is what I normally use to work on my comic pages).  So sadly, you have to endure..."ariel"...ick...!

My biggest beef with this is that The Thing doesn't look like The Thing.  However, since I put about as much time into this as the idiot that decided Galactus was going to be a giant storm cloud, I feel that it does the movie justice.  I'm sick of movies being made that take from excellent source material, and then butcher them.  The Fantastic Four movie was apparently based on the Ultimate Fantastic Four comic line, which does change up the mythology of the characters a bit, but I'm sorry...Dr. Doom was a pansy and completely uninteresting in that movie.  It had no drama, no spectacular scenes, and the only performance worth watching was Michael Chiklis through about a foot of rubber and paint.  Suffice it to say, I don't expect the sequel to be any better.


This comic was inspired by a rumor that I heard about the original teaser trailer for the movie.  Apparently, Silver Surfer was "accidently" made to be anatomically correct.  IE:  He had a little silver penis. 

After hearing this, I started reading the latest issue of Wizard (which was talking about the latest comic movies, and was looking at some of the production design elements from the new F4 movie), and noticed that (other than Jessica Alba's very tan skin, overtly blonde hair, horrible blue contact lenses, and lack of acting ability) everyone's cod piece was jutting out from their tights.  I mean, very noticeably.  I remember people complaining about Superman having a large cod piece when Superman Returns came out, and apparently it was digitall modified to be less noticable.  Well, I think they need to do that here too, folks. 

So then I thought about a book I read back in the day (which inspired my comic G-Man: The Defender of Food) called "How to Be a Superhero" by Mark Leigh and Mike Lepine.  You can't find this book anymore, except for maybe on amazon.com for $50 used.  It's a hilarious book, and it kept making references to the fact that superheroes are jealous of other superheroes with amazing stretching powers (ie: Mr. Fantastic).  This is a penis joke, for those of you who are not with me so far.

Hence, I decided to make a penis joke too. 

In any case, I hope you enjoy my very rushed comic this week, and I think next week's will be better.  Keep coming back every Friday for more @$$hole!

Ah yes, eventually I had to get these two together.  Susie (the little scary girl from the Ring movies) and Charlie, the poltergeist that always moves  the rug in my doorway, have finally gotten together.  In all fairness, I probably should've pushed this back a little and had some comics about them individually before this meeting, but I've been on a roll with the Susie stories. 

I've got another one ready for next week, but I'm going to try to make one for the Fantastic Four 2 release instead...I can't pass up on a chance to make fun of Jessica Alba.  Here's hoping I'm able to pull a complete comic together this weekend from scratch...if not two pages.


A little shout out to Joe Dunn, who illustrated the picture of my head in the background (I colored it).  The full illustration (both his original art and his art with my colors) is available in my sketches section.  That is my avatar on his website, and I post on the forums probably more than I should.  Joe is the creator / artist of many popular web comics including Free Lunch, Turtle vs. Bunny, and Joe Loves Crappy Movies, and also lends his pencils to Coffee Achievers and Matriculated.  You can find his artwork all over the internet, including some guest strips for the exile comics group and for myself.  He's a busy guy, and puts out some great artwork in very little time.

Wow, "link over-load" up there. 

In any case, keep coming back every Friday for more @$$hole.  Until then, enjoy yourselves!

T

I know that G-Man is everyone's favorite comic that I work on (who could resist that college-ruled paper background, lack of color or shading, the high school humor, and the artwork that looks it was illustrated during math class?), so I wanted to make sure everyone was aware that I just updated a few additional pages online.

G-Man: The Defender of Food has officially reached 65 pages right now, but I have so many more left to clean up before I can start working on new content for G-Man.  I was working on some web banners over the weekend for my comics, and started thinking about some of the stories that I'd like to tell - and how much further I have to go in this continuity before I could even think about telling them.  There's so much back story that hasn't even been revealed yet that I couldn't even think of doing a new page yet - readers would be like, "Who's this and who's that?"  I haven't even gotten to the pages that introduce some main characters.

The alien, the one-eyed one-horned flying purple people eatter, Marty the Guido Slayer, and even G-Man's worst enemy:  the Mystery Guy! 

However, I'm starting to try for regular updates for G-Man...weekly, if not monthly (monthly would obviously involve a larger influx of pages, where as weely would just be 2-4 page updates at a time). 

In any case, check out the new pages here (sorry I left you on a cliffhanger), and let me know what you think.